EXCLUSIVE: Anna Shows Karl How To Fete Thanksgiving

by Julia Rubin | 10:20 am, November 25th, 2010

Today is Thanksgiving, that most sacred of American holidays. It is the day that people across this great nation will eat too much turkey, get nagged by their annoying relatives and give thanks for one thing or another. You know who celebrates Thanksgiving? Anna Wintour! Yes, homegirl is an American citizen. And this year she wanted to teach her oh-so-Euro friend Karl how to celebrate the holiday in style. Join us as we regale you with the true tale of Karl Lagerfeld’s very first Thanksgiving.

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1.Karl's First Thanksgiving

Just a few days ago...

Karl: Sup?
Anna: Karl!
Karl: Yo Anna!
Anna: Oh, I'm so pleased you picked up! I thought you didn't use your cell phone...?
Karl: Naw shawty, I do. It's white gold.
Anna: Right. Well anyway, I think it's about time you start celebrating Thanksgiving. I mean, you just signed a deal with Macy's, and they put on the annual Thanksgiving Day Parade, for goodness' sake!

2.Karl's First Thanksgiving

Karl: Word, boo — I'm down. What is this Thanksgiving ish all about?
Anna: Listen, I don't have time to explain it to you. Just check out the Wikipedia page on your iPad. Dinner starts at 5 o'clock Thursday night.
Karl: Yo, that is mad early. What are we eating?
Anna: Turkey.
Karl: Turkey?!
Anna: Yes, turkey. Like "gobble gobble turkey" turkey.

3.Karl's First Thanksgiving

Karl: Anna, you're my girl and all, but I'm not eating turkey.
Anna: Ugh, you're insufferable.
Karl: I don't mean to get all emo on your ass, but I can't go back to Fat Karl. Even Devon was all, "Ew gross, Fat Karl." Fat Karl is dead.
Anna: Fine! We'll eat tofurkey. Certainly that's Karl Lagerfeld Diet-approved? Meet me at Whole Foods tomorrow at noon sharp.

4.Karl's First Thanksgiving

At Whole Foods...

Karl: Yo Anna, I'm going to check out the mag selection with my hot homie while you get the ingredients. That cool?
Anna: No Karl, it's not "cool." But I'll meet you at checkout.

5.Karl's First Thanksgiving

Thansgiving day...

Anna: Look Karl! I've invited all of our most fashionable friends to your very first Thanksgiving dinner — Hamish, Linda Fargo, Diane Kruger.
Karl: So fashion! Are you going to carve the tofurkey now?
Diane: Yeah, I'm getting kind of hungry.
Anna: Do I have to do everything around here? Did you even notice I garnished the tofurkey with fruit just for you, Karl?

6.Karl's First Thanksgiving

Karl: Yo, I know you think I don't appreciate it, but this is the best Thanksgiving I've ever had.
Anna: It's the only Thanksgiving you've ever had.
Karl: Don't be like that! I love you, boo.
Anna: Yeah, yeah. I guess I love you, too. Happy Thanksgiving, Karl.