Oh….my. If Amanda Bynes didn’t like tabloids before, she definitely doesn’t like them now. The cover of this week’s In Touch loudly proclaims “Destroyed by Fame!” and, the real kicker, “First ever photos: Inside her wild home.” Apparently, Bynes invited a pair of photographers over for some late night partying recently, opening up her “drug den” of an apartment for the world to see. Now, she’s on one hell of a rampage (all over her never dull Twitter feed, natch), claiming the photos were faked and lashing out at the “ugly faced black man” who sold them.
The photos are accompanied by the headline “The Darkest Night Of Her Life” and show an apartment littered with baggies of weed and containing only a bare mattress, which the 27-year-old reclines on in a sheer dress. In another photo, Bynes applies makeup in the bathroom mirror as paparazzi Giovanni Arnold stands behind her — although this time there’s no “twerking out” video…yet. As far as “dark nights” go, it’s all relatively tame. Tame, but so, SO strange.
According to Bynes, that’s because the photos are faked. Per her latest Twitter screed:
“That’s not my bed! Those aren’t my toes! My toes are pedicured! I just did an exclusive interview with intouch last week, now they bought fake altered photos by that ugly black man in the photo or someone who knows him! They used an old shot of me on the cover with a bad angle of my old nose before I had surgery to reshape my profile and to remove the webbing from my eyes. I have to sue because that’s not my apartment, those aren’t my clothes! They morphed photos of my face onto someone’s body to ruin my life! I have to make a big deal of this and sue because that’s not me! I care about my appearance so I have to defend myself! I look like a different person now that I had surgery! Why did they put an old shot of me on the cover? I don’t look like that anymore! I only want photos of my gorgeous new nose on the cover of tabloids and real magazines! The photos in this issue are fake and mocked up! I don’t care enough to keep talking about it. Just assume that I fucked the boyfriend of the editor of intouch because they fucking hate me!”
The editor, Jessica Finn, has since been the target of more of Bynes’ signature venom:
“This ugly faced woman @JessicaFinnNYC is the one who bought fake photos of me & put that picture that looks nothing like me on the cover!”
“@JessicaFinnNYC hey ugly.”
As has her declared nemesis, Perez Hilton:
“@PerezHilton: the only thing sadder than your ugly face still writing stories about me is the fact that you think I’d even step foot in a room with that ugly faced black man.”
Moral of the story? Those with ugly faces should not cross Amanda Bynes.
UPDATE: We have received the following statement from a spokesperson for In Touch Weekly. Judge accordingly:
The photos of Amanda Bynes inside this week’s issue of In Touch speak for themselves. We at In Touch have done our due diligence and research on the photos and the article that accompanies them.
In Touch has not altered or photoshopped these photos in any way. Additionally, the photographer has assured In Touch that these photos of Amanda were not altered or photoshopped in any way prior to the magazine obtaining them and they are, in fact, of Amanda Bynes taken at Amanda’s apartment in New York City. All of Amanda’s claims pertaining to the photos in this week’s In Touch are false.
this is some kind of spaceship or something.