Invasion of the Giant Chanel Pearls, Starring Keira Knightley

They come from the deepest, darkest recesses of … Karl Lagerfeld’s Mind. They clamp onto the necks of beautiful women … and don’t let go until their hosts land magazine covers. They took over the Grand Palaisand Instagram.

They’re … giant Chanel pearls!

The megalomania might not be real, but these spheres of calcium carbonate are definitely bent on ruling the world one way or another. They first captured our imaginations when they rolled past the Kaiser’s creepy naked-man statue; soon after, an entire platoon of fashion editors started growing cue-ball-sized tumors on their throats, wrists and fingers. You know what they say — Anya Ziourova today, all the fashion spreads tomorrow.

Neither Keira Knightley nor Jessica Hart were (presumably) harmed in the making of these Vogue Australia and Harper’s Bazaar UK issues, but mark our words — this isn’t the last we’ll see of those monsters.

Get to know thine enemy below.

Related Links:
The Best and Worst Magazine Covers of January 2014
Joan Smalls: Taking over the World Three Covers at a Time
PFW: Chanel Spring 2014 is Rough-Around-the-Edges Elegance

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