Obviously Karl Lagerfeld Doesn’t Wash His Own Hair

If you had 30 minutes with Karl Lagerfeld, what would you ask him? W asked him lots of things, and the answers certainly do not disappoint — not that we would expect anything less than chic absurdity from the Kaiser. Allow us to present seven Karlisms that will make your day.

1. “I’m always busy. You know, the more I do, the more ideas I have—that’s the funny thing. The brain is a muscle, and I’m a kind of body-builder.”

(But he really was an actual bodybuilder.)

2. “I’m not an employee who goes to the office every morning at the same time. Then, vacations are needed. I’m like a rock singer with one-night stands on the road.”

Now that is an awesome analogy. But does he wash his own hair?

3. “No, I have someone who comes to the house and washes it, puts in the dry shampoo, and takes care if it because I have no time. I don’t even have time to go to the dentist. I’m busy but in a pleasant way. I’m the one who wanted to do all of it, so I can’t complain.”

Of course not!

4. “I’m not mad for thongs.”

Is he talking about underwear or footwear? Unclear! Just don’t ask him about Balmain.

5. “Forget about it! This was a job done by a fashion editor. I don’t even know the name of the man who did it, so don’t ask me about that.”

Sick burn, dude. But when was the last time he cried?

6. “I’m trying to think of the last time I had onions.”

The man (robot?) is a machine!  And now, we’ll leave you with the single least believable thing he said:

7. “Well, I don’t want to be in-fashion.”

[W]

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