As part of the launch of Madonna’s new line Material Girl for Macy’s, daughter Lourdes Leon has been blogging up a storm on the brand’s website. At times insightful, at times hilarious, and at times somewhat illiterate, the posts prove that Lourdes is what we’d always suspected: a natural blogger.
In reading her posts, we’ve realized we have a lot to learn from Lourdes. So here are five best blogging practices we’ve learned from Miss Leon.
1. Always Explain Your Slang.
For a 13-year-old, Lourdes Leon is remarkably aware of the fact that most people across the pond and/or over the age of 18 have no idea what she’s talking about most of the time. So, like any good blogger, she’s careful to explain her acronyms, colloquialisms, and newly-minted words. Just because you use words like FABNOSITY (capitalized) in everyday speech, doesn’t mean anyone else does.
Examples: “They are BLINGING INNIT MATE (British ghetto talk, its var var LOL).” “Some of the spanish players are PFH (pretty freakin hot):P”
2. Use Slang
If there’s one lesson to be learned about blogging, it’s to have a voice. People love blogs because they’re kind of personal — at least more so than magazines. And a lot of that has to do with relatability. And with whom do you relate more? Obama host Anna Wintour? Or a pajama-wearing blogger working from their couch in a small, barely air-conditioned apartment in New York City? Anyway! Part of having a voice is using personalized and identifiable words. I, for example, really like to hyphenate things. Lourdes, for example, really likes to make up words altogether. These should be capitalized for maximum effect.
Examples: FINA-FREAKING-LY, OH MY DAIZ, FABNOSITY.
3. Complain About Your Boss
There’s nothing more endearing and relatable than a blogger whose boss drives them crazy. Because whose boss doesn’t drive them crazy? In Lourdes’ case, her boss is her mom, so it’s smart of her to pepper her posts with underminey comments about Madonna. It makes her seem almost like a normal kid, as opposed to one who has the most famous singer in the world as her mother and/or a line at Macy’s.
Examples: “I am FINALLY allowed to dye my hair…” “I went to the Jay-Z concert recently… My mom was dancing the entire time which is LOL now that I think about it, but in the moment I was just like, ‘mom…..no…please no’.”
4. Name Drop
Nothing gives you more cred than talking about all the important people you run into. Remember, most bloggers work from home and get paid diddly, so one of the few perks of the job is invites to parties wherein the invites come with the publicist’s tacit hope that you’ll write about the parties and all the fabulous who were there. Lourdes has this down pat. Probably because she’s Madonna’s daughter.
Examples: “I met Kelly Osbourne and Luke Worrall, who are maybe THE coolest couple I have met; they both have such great style as well.”
5. Be Self-Deprecating
In case you haven’t noticed, it’s a really smart move to make yourself sound kind of sad and pitiful. That way you’re even more relatable! Also: you won’t sound like a jerk when you’re doing all the aforementioned name-dropping. It’s especially important for Lourdes to do this, because she’s Madonna’s daughter. And as a 13-year-old with a clothing line, she’s got to make sure she doesn’t sound like a jerk.
Examples: “Helluuur thurrrr, I’m Lola and this is my first blog entry so it’s kind of like ummmm….” “Stay tuned if you don’t already think I’m annoying.”