Forget about the World Cup — the most important cultural battle has just been decided and since you were too busy watching human adults chase each other on a field like it was fucking recess, a man whose name is an entire fucking sentence got to call an issue of NATIONAL CONCERN.
Hippity hop producer and real-life equivalent of those Finding Nemo seagulls MIKE WiLL Made It appeared on Hot 97’s morning show and made a claim that has rocked the nation and set fire to the rain: according to Mr. Made It, Miley Cyrus can roll a better blunt than Rihanna. Ring the bells at King’s Landing, cue Varys’ LOL NOPE I’M OUT face.
“To tell you the truth, not too many people have been around Miley,” he told the hosts. “But I’ve been around her and she’ll roll a blunt this fat.” When asked about Bad Gal RiRi’s skills, Will was less effusive, leaving it at “Rihanna rolls blunts, too.” He continued, “But you know what it is? Rihanna rolls blunts. I don’t really smoke blunts. I smoke papers. Miley rolls papers, you know what I’m saying?”
We believe we do know what you are saying, MIKE WiLL Made It: to compare the fruits of the pop stars’ labor is to compare apples and oranges. Or, more literally, blunts and joints. (A phrase that unfortunately never found its way into Poor Richard’s Almanack.)
To see MIKe WiLL Make It — and by “it” we mean “the worst judgement call of his life” (and we’re talking about the guy who released this, so…) — fast forward to 15:52.
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