Perhaps it is easiest to get our point if you picture Abercrombie & Fitch, American Eagle, and, to a lesser extent, Aeropostale as cookie cutters stamping out little skintight-hoodie- and sequined-henley-wearing gingerbread kids. We’ve often thought about how maybe in the near (brighter) future these whippersnappers would start wearing moose-appliqué sweats ironically, and given how these brands aren’t doing so hot, that day could be sooner than we imagined. High fives all around.
It’s not that we take pleasure in other people’s pain — name that tune — or in companies facing declining sales and losing customers to other scandal-fraught establishments with ageist names, but we do sort of love to hear that bastions of blondness, athleticism, exclusivity, and felt letters might topple, allowing individuality and clothes with volume to flood the consciousness of the American youth.
Dinner-plate-sized logos might become unbearably embarrassing the second you get to college and catch the “find your true self” bug, but the absence of these preppy mall stores could mean that quest for sartorial identity arises even earlier. BuzzFeed pinpoints H&M as one potential PMS (chortle) conqueror, which, you know, is pretty great because the sheer vastness of its stock encourages impressionable boys and girls to try out different styles.
“But then won’t everyone shop at H&M and start to dress alike again? Hmmmmmmm?” (That was us pretending to be you. You can be really annoying.) Yes, that could happen, but to us, that’s still preferable to popped collars and a frankly creepy ideology based on physical characteristics. So there.
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