This week’s Rachel Zoe Project centered around the dramafest that was the 67th Annual Golden Globe Awards. Not only did Zoe have five clients to style, but all of them refused to be fitted for their dresses more than 24 hours before the event. Oh. Em. Gee. Also: she was sans assistant-turned-terrorist Taylor Jacobson. (More on that later.) How was everything going to get done in time?
Luckily for Zoe and assistant-turned-Style Director Brad Goreski, the New Taylor was starting just in time. The New Taylor is quieter than the Old Taylor but also more boring. Which is why we’ve already forgotten her name. We suspect she’ll ratchet up the dramz within an episode or two — she had to have been screen-tested for this thing, right?
Anyway, Zoe’s clients for this year’s Globes included Cameron Diaz — who had a lot to live up to after laying down the red carpet law in a customized, hot-pink Chanel Couture gown, Molly Sims, Jennifer Garner, Kate Hudson, and Paula Patton.
We’ll be honest — though, if you watch the show, you probably won’t be surprised — not much happened. Zoe, Brad, and New Taylor fretted over the gowns, the jewelry, and the last minute fittings. A slight narrative arc occurred when a grey Versace Atelier gown went missing from the hotel where it was meant to be picked up. This was a two-fold problem. One: because a grey Versace Atelier gown went missing and two: because Zoe — having never seen the dress before in her life — was certain it was just meant to be worn by Diaz. But then the gown was found (inexplicably en route to Pierce Brosnan’s Malibu abode) and Zoe decided it wasn’t all that Diaz-worthy after all.
Despite mock burning a Taylor effigy at the end of the season premiere, Zoe and Brad seemed to have some serious trouble putting the past behind them — especially when they learned Old Taylor was styling someone for the Golden Globes. (Don’t worry, it was only a producer.) Thankfully, Rodger — who by far and away may have been the star of this episode — swooped in to offer some handy advice which basically involved calling Old Taylor a terrorist.
Speaking of Rodger, he also dedicated a large portion of his screen time to affirming his heterosexuality, which was adorable in its own way.
Despite the rain, despite the last minute fittings, and despite the missing-but-not Versace gown, all of Zoe’s clients ended up clothed, bejeweled, and ready to go — which is both unexciting and fascinating because the Golden Globes were way back in January and we can now take a trip down memory lane to reminisce. It’s a red carpet redux! Enjoy!
this is some kind of spaceship or something.
[Images via Getty.]