Diesel’s 2014 Calendar is Very NSFW Yet Very Boring

Because nothing screams “welcome to the future” like hiring 2013′s creepiest GWC to shoot your 2014 calendar, Diesel have tapped Terry Richardson to do just that for their collaborative Playboy calendar.

The 12 very NSFW (not safe for walls) images feature 12 girls in different states of undress. There’s lots of skin, lots of boob, and lots of something else that has been censored by cutesy star shapes and emojis. Super kawaii!!

2014’s calendar is part of a brand overhaul implanted by the 35-year-old label. Lady Gaga’s ex-costumer and former main man at Mugler, Nicola Formichetti, was recently taken on board as creative director. At the time Renzo Rosso, the 57-year-old founder of the brand, told WWD that he’s finally found someone as crazy as he is to take over at Diesel: “I want him to do bigger things, different things. This is the right man to take the next step for a young company and a brand for people who are young of mind.”

We’ll have to wait until Fall 2014 to see Formichetti’s crazy mindset manifests itself on the runway. But his campaign for ‘Diesel Tribute’, a small collection of jeans, jackets and denim shirts inspired by classic pieces, promised good things. Starring Miss January 2014 Brooke Candy and the devastatingly gorgeous Joshua Coleman, and shot entirely on an iPhone, it was a polite but fresh hat tip to the brand’s history.

So safe to say we’re pretty bummed out by this spangly boob of a calendar. The costumes defy logic by packing an out-of-control amount of tackiness into so little fabric, and the artistic direction is equally remarkable for its ability to make so much boobage so boring. Further, it’s pretty racist. With the exception of one very slightly darker-skinned model (the Dominican Republic’s Omahyra Mota) and one half-Indonesian (and half-English) (Charlotte Carey), it looks like 2014 is going to be a very white-washed year. And can we please propose answers as to why Miss Redface September is about to poo through a dreamcatcher? This is just wrong on so many levels.

Let it be known this is nothing against the models, of whom at least three are amongst our favorite people to stalk on Instagram. It’s just a bummer Diesel didn’t make a bolder casting decision regarding their choice of photographer. See Kate Moss‘ own Playboy shoot (by Mert Alas and Marcus Piggott) for proof that the theme ‘babes getting naked’ can be interpreted stylishly.

Related links:
Lady-Killer Friday: Joshua Coleman and His Perma-Movember ‘Stache
Nicola Formichetti Named Artistic Director at Diesel
Vogue, H&M, Mango: Who’s Still Working With Terry Richardson?

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