We know, we know — we can’t expect any of the pageant moms who agree to appear on Toddlers and Tiaras to be great people. But we’re classic humanists here in the Styleite office, so we have to believe there’s a kernel of good in everyone. Last night’s episode sort of proved that wrong.
TLC viewers met Marlo and her 10-year-old daughter Sydney in the teaser clip below, in which Marlo admits that she’s not just crazy, she’s insane. She also mimics an Asian woman’s accent and bad English while gives her daughter a pedicure, invoking that old stereotype that everyone who works in a nail salon came to America straight from the Far East. She also says she thinks she might have “jungle fever.” We get that she might not have meant to say that exactly, given that her daughter is clearly of mixed racial origin, but it is rendered even more offensive than it normally is when you realize her daughter is clearly of mixed racial origin. But we digress:
Yes, Sydney. Your mom is crazy. We know this because we see her trying to stuff her daughter’s body like a sausage into a too-tight dress with a corset. Sydney’s dad Donald isn’t on board with the pageants, but like most of the other spouses on this program, he lets it happen. Mostly, he just doesn’t want to see his daughter paraded around in front of people half naked, which we think is a reasonable desire. Marlo, on the other hand, just wants to make sure no one sees Sydney’s crack until she’s 13.
Again. We know. We know there’s no point in raising our own blood pressure because people are stupid and they’re scarring their children for life. They’re adults; they chose to live that way. But when their kids have to deal with the scarring of being pimped out for their parent’s amusement, we hope they know where to place the blame.