This weather is making us particularly susceptible to jealousy right now, so the front rows of Haute Couture Fashion Week in Paris are a big ol’ kick in the face that just hurts so damn good. Sure the shows themselves are providing plenty to rave about. Multi-media modeling, high-octane colors and NAOMI FREAKIN’ CAMPBELL — but it’s who’s occupying the prime seats that we want to see.
Emma Roberts, Mena Suvari and Uma Thurman all kindly donated an hour of their time to check out some Atelier Versace. Emma looks incredible in white, particularly with her hair out of her face, and the dress is so beautifully crisp that we almost don’t notice she borrowed the shoes from Taylor Momsen. Plus asymmetry is obviously the jam in Paris (see: Christian Dior arrivals). Mena Suvari is wearing our favorite shade of sunshine yellow, and France’s answer to Leigh Lezark, Delphine Chanéac, provides the requisite dosage of slashie cool.
Over at Christian Dior’s show Jennifer Lawrence surprised us by pairing her new Miss Dior crown with an outfit that had more than one thing on common with Anna Dello Russo’s. When in Paris? She’s also wearing a skirt-pants (skants?) hybrid that we wish didn’t also remind of Miley Cyrus and noughties social networking, but since it’s Dior we’ll allow it. Leelee Sobieski wore a more subtle version of the trend and looked incredible. Miroslava Duma was surprising in a different way, wearing a simple frock in contrasting blue and orange, while Oliva Palermo looked magical as a holographic cupcake princess.
Giambattista Valli’s stark white show space and bone china-based collection were complimented by an equally delicate front row. Anna Wintour and her daughter Bee Shaffer wore gorgeous matching stripes, which Anna accessorized with a smile and Bee a half-hearted smirk. Ughhh don’t you hate when Mum drags you to Paris? Miroslava Duma was again wearing tangerine and white, this time in a shift dress with sheer inserts, and Harry Brant’s date was cradling an exotic fruit like a human baby.
Chanel haute couture. You don’t get much more front row than that. Unfortunately Rihanna didn’t get that memo, and neglected to put on pants or a top under a sheer cardigan that was otherwise very beautiful. More Chanel-y were Clemence Poesy, Milla Jovovich, Miroslava Duma and Alexa Chung in various monochromatic hues and luxe tweedy textures, while Kristen Stewart wore exactly what Karl would have worn if he was a long-legged gal in his early 20s. Haters gon’ hate, but in this case her scowl is perfect. Also, Michael Pitt.
Dressing dull for Elie Saab Couture is like being straight and getting in a picture with gays. You’re just not gonna shine. Miroslava Duma in particular stepped it UP accordingly, wearing a stunning dress-and-shawl combo printed like English porcelain and stained glass windows. Person we didn’t know before Elena Perminova cemented herself firmly in a very Coachella Couture ensemble of boots, hat and dusty rose lace, and Petra Nemcova rocked deep royal blue.
Our new look next season is corporate-goth cake stripper, because Olivia Palermo is so stunning in her crisp shirt, very diva jewels and black roses that we almost didn’t notice there are two giant African safari animals standing behind her. Also doing the cake thang was Nicky Hilton(?), while Zhang Ziyi went for a sleek scarlet creation that’s probably now stained with Valentino’s unique shade of toxic tan.
Viktor & Rolf:
Apparently a collection that was already half sold didn’t overly interest Rose McGowan, who missed the show but arrived for the reception in a drapey black dress offset with light pink lipstick. Pace Wu went the opposite way, toughening up a frilly white gown with a chain-accented waist belt.
Jean Paul Gaultier:
Jean Paul Gaultier’s front row decided to leave the drama for a runway this year. Miroslava Duma was understandably colored and printed out, opting for a well-ventilated black maxi dress, and Carine Roitfeld tried her hand corporate athleticism in a red pencil skirt and shirt-cum-bomber jacket.
From where you’d rather be (and what you’d rather be wearing):
this is some kind of spaceship or something.