We know; it’s just impractical to go around defriending everyone who’s clogging up your Facebook feed with ALS Ice Bucket Challenge videos. It’s a stupid stunt that accomplishes nothing save making people feel better for “raising awareness” while making it look like they’re donating money. (Hint: they are probably not donating money.) And, intellectually, you know this, and so it hurts your heart when an otherwise awesome person you know succumbs to the pressure of dumb social media stunts.
True story: someone tagged me in a “nomination” this weekend, I immediately untagged myself with a shudder while waiting in the boyfriend chairs outside an Urban Outfitters dressing room, wishing not to be associated with such nonsense, and the offending friend IMMEDIATELY RE-TAGGED ME, FOLLOWED BY SENDING A MESSAGE THAT READ “oops, did I not actually tag you?”
No. No, you did tag me. I untagged myself in repulsion after thinking I’d make it through the Ice Bucket plague without being infected, and then you destroyed my best attempt at immunization.
You know who understands my pain, your pain, and the pain that everyone will feel in three years when Facebook stalking themselves and realizing the fullness of their idiocy for the first time? Amy Schumer. Presenting: the clam chowder challenge. (With granny panties.)